When Financial Stress Reaches a Breaking Point

I had two unpleasant work related incidents last week.  In the first, a young colleague, unable to prioritize all of the many tasks put before her, seemed to reach a breaking point, where she was hurling insults to everyone and visibly showing signs of stress (like crying).  In the second, a more experienced colleague, who should be able to prioritize the difference between urgent things and important things, rang me up to yell (and I mean Y-E-L-L) about a trivial email that he was miffed for not being cc:d on.  Both of these persons is suffering from stress related to financial problems.  In the first case, the inability to hire another associate meant that my colleague is attempting to complete the tasks normally intended for at least two (frankly closer to 3.5).  In the second case, with pressures to fundraise for the organization, dramatically increased testiness is due to the growing realization from many in the non-profit sector that this season’s fundraising, although in some cases better than a year ago, has not shown the dramatic improvement most had hoped.

With unemployment high and the real estate market in the doldrums, I am also hearing tales from friends and acquaintances of sleepless nights, family squabbles, and stress related illnesses over financial woes.  With the holiday season fast approaching and a chance to try to refresh and recharge (or to pile up credit card bills if not careful), I hope many (including my colleagues), will take the time to try to re-examine their priorities and reduce the stress of financial burdens.  The following are things that I have done to relieve financial pressures in the past:

Take a time out — yes, this technique works well for wrought up three year olds and twenty-three year olds, and forty-three year olds too.  Sometimes it is important just to breathe a bit.  If you see someone around you that might need to be calmed, try bringing them a small gift or offer to go for a walk together.

Write out a list — write down all of the potential people, places, sources that you might turn to for help.  This may be referrals for job leads, networks that you belong to, or possible avenues for financial help.  Simply knowing that there are options, and visibly seeing them can be helpful.

Make pre-emptive budgetary cuts — I am amazed at the number of people who refuse to slash a budget, even though the warning signs are there that the financial environment may either worsen or be prolonged.

Have a group meeting — in an office this may be your team, and at home, this may be with the whole family.  Often times, the other members of your team and family will be very understanding of the situation and have possible solutions.  For families with children old enough to understand what unemployment and changing financial circumstances mean, keeping them informed is usually a better path than trying to keep appearances that everything is as it was.

Try to prioritize health issues — Even thought it is tempting, turning to excessive coffee, eating junk food (my challenge), and skipping exercise is likely to compound the symptoms of stress and cortisol in your body.  When you feel the world is beating you up, you should treat yourself kindly: eat as healthy as possible, take time to exercise, and take the other steps to keep yourself in good health.

shared at this week’s Carnival of Personal Finance